Tag: Nosebleed

Self Scouting and Kotter Fest @ THE Ballroom

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17 (or 18) hearty Fort Pax unpartook of the fartsack to join their brothers at Ballroom. Amazed to see some Kotters (like Free Bird and Deep Dish) as I pulled in. Always exciting to see some of the boys come back to the Gloom just like it’s exciting when new faces show up. Bro hugs ensued.

At the appointed hour, Disclaimer was given and we were off to the other side of PKMS for:

Warm-O-Rama ; Seal Jacks, Merkins/Plank series/Imperial walker, Squats, LBCs. MNCs. Then a nice mosey to the football field for:

The Thang;

7 of diamonds – 7 Plank Jacks in each corner of the field, Bear Crawl to Goal Post then Lunge Walk. Run Length of field 2nd Lap- 7 Plank Jacks & 14 Squats- Got some of the newer Pax to call the cadence, getting ’em ready.

To the track – Partner up, CATCH ME IF YOU CAN -3 BURPEES/PARTNER. RUN BACKWARDS AROUND TRACK. Round 2-5 Bombjacks, but run forwards.

Some Words ON Self Scouting in the New Year- Take to time to look back at your year with an eye towards improving in some area in 2020. Learn form your past mistakes but don’t let them define your trajectory. Your History is not your Destiny.

Back to FIELD – Captain Thor Lite – 1 Weezy, 4 Am Hammers then Jack Webb (6 rounds). Mosey to COT. Announcements- One Word Convergence, Grapevine Takeover. Prayers for healing Pax, Lost loved ones, marriages.

Great group this morning, Honored to Serve these fine men.

Shortest Of All Sales.

 

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The snake pit 12/18/19

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F07A9CBF-DBA9-43DF-96EE-3E615C1EE305Had a fun time for my first Q, was very interesting getting ready for it. we had 17 people show up with 2 fng’s present.

warmup :

-lap around parking lot

-windmills (10)

-ssh (25)

-cherry pickers(15)

-hillbilly walkers (15)

-imperial walkers (15)

-lbc’s (10)

-Moroccan nightclubs (20)

 

pre-workout (wall)

-wallsit/kB  (everyone did 5 burpees until reach middle)

-calf raises (30 seconds) X2

-wallsit/kb (everyone did 5 Merkins until reach middle)

 

workout (partner):

-KB Swings (200)

-American hammers (200)

-lbc’s (200)

-rows (300)

-squats (200)

 

C.O.T

-Floyd plank (20 seconds) “quite a bit of complaining involved “

-circle of Mary (until 6:00)

We finished with the name o Rama and names two FNG’s

thanks again for letting me Q for the first time, it was a fun experience and will definitely try to do again!!

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Inertia at The Ballroom

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19 PAX at The Ballroom

Above is the insight into my mind……

Here’s a more legible list of what we did:
Mosey in a circle to catch Renaissance
– SSH – used to count the PAX present….
– IW x a few
– HW x the same amount
– Peter Parker until dissent
– Down Dog – Up Dog
– Shoulder Tap until dissent

Mosey to basketball court
– Toy Solders a sufficient distance to garner griping about this being a “Moderate” workout
– Butt Kickers
– Side Shuffles

Mosey down the hill
Split into 3 groups to do a Leg-O-Rama (one PAX does the reps, other PAX hold the pose until all have completed the reps)
– Squats
– Calf Raises
– Monkey Humpers
– 5 reps
– Run up the hill do 10 reps of each
– Run down do 15 reps of each

Mosey to Basketball court
– some burpees in cadence
– a round of Howling Monkeys to 10

Mosey back
– did some step ups when YHC found a plethora of benches

COT

NMM:
How often do we let the inertia of what we are or have been prevent us from realizing our potential?

Thanks to Manziel for the opportunity to lead
Band Camp dismissed.
 

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Snake Pit – Quarter Pounders w/ Cheese

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After rescheduling this too many times due to conflicts, able to finally Q at this fine establishment. Special guest Partnerwork who’s kind of a big deal showed up. Gave the obligatory disclosure and we were off.

To get the blood flowing, began with a kettle bell mosey down to the lower entrance of the football field.

Warm up IN cadence:

  • SSH
  • IWs – little extra practice nice before to avoid repeating the epic failure from my Block Party Q
  • Cherry Pickers
  • Mtn. Climbers
  • Low Country Crab – found this one in the Exicon
  • Freddie Mercury

Quick recovery and Partnerwork opened the gates with the keys to the castle. Questions about a random tire placed by gate arose but was ignored.

The Thang

Line up at the goal line to explain the objective. Carry your kettlebell every 10 yards and execute number of corresponding reps to the end zone. Cyclops pointed out this is a reverse pyramid.

  • 10 – Man Makers
  • 20 – KB Swings
  • 30 – Gobblet Squats
  • 40 – Curls
  • 50 – Tricep Extensions
  • Repeat past the 50 to end zone

Checking time, needed to call a few audibles.

  • Grabbed some wall and proceeded with dirty hookups in  cadence x 30.
  • Jack Webbs (1×4 to 5×20)
  • Shoulder Taps x 30

Lined up on goal line for next field round.

Quarter Pounder

  • 10 KB swings to start, run to following yard markers, execute corresponding reps and run back backwards to start w/ 10 KB swings before running to next marker.
    • 25 yards – Merkins
    • 50 yards – American Hammers
    • 75 yards – Mountain Climbers
    • 100 yards – Calf Raises

With time running out, decided to head back to COT but with a bonus. Inspired by Geronimo’s Q at Laces In,  decided we should Indian run with our kettle bells with leader also carrying tire. It was met with enthusiasm.

Reached COT with a few minutes to spare, MARY Ab workouts in cadence until time.

Announcements: Thanksgiving convergence, Christmas party

Prayers/Praises: health, unspokens, upcoming travel

Thanks to Partnerwork for the field access , 3D for the opportunity, and the wisdom of other PAX  for this junior Q.

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Kettlebells of Catan

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YHC is quite thankful for the opportunity to Q the Armory. I’d been avoiding bells for a while to try to up my running game and down my BMI game, and throwing a bell in the back of the car gave me that warm, familiar feeling…

Rolled into the parking lot and saw an impressive fleet of vehicles in the gloom.  Quickly dropped off my small box of goodies and joined the pax just in time to disclaim that I’m no professional.

Warm Up

Things started off with a quarter mile mosey around the parking lot. Followed by some SSH, zucchini** pickers, merkins, mountain climbers, and windmills.  Then grab the bells and head to the NE lot where my box of stuff was.

What’s In The Box?

After we paired up I pulled out the box’s contents. 4 pens (all I could find this morning) two dice from my wife’s copy of Settler’s of Catan, and 8 sheets of paper.

Math? Really…?

Stats, yeah… If you’re familiar with the distribution of a die roll of 2 six sided dice, you’ll see why rolling 2 and 12 are particularly painful, the odds are 1/36 for each, while rolling a 7 is 1/6.  Let’s look at the bell curve (more of a triangle).

This is the core game mechanic in the game Setttler’s of Catan.  Using probability along with some randomness, the game rewards people 5/6ths of the time and punishes them 1/6th of the time.  YHC thought long and hard on how to include that mechanic in our morning workout, but decided on loyalty to the beatdown. Perhaps later more will be added to that 7 roll.

Enough of that noise…

Back to the Thang, the least likely rolls were assigned the more difficult tasks, while the more probable rolls had tasks that PAX could more readily repeat. Each sheet was identical:

2. 20x man makers
3. 20x upright rows
4. 10x man makers
5. 8x each/16x both arm curls
6. 10x goblet squats
7. 15x swings
8. 20x chest press
9. 8x each plank row
10. 20x dead lift
11. 5x each Turkish get up
12. 20x man makers

YHC quickly explained that every team was to roll the dice, and the roll dictated the exercise they were to do.  The counts on the paper were per person, not per team. A team was free to divide the exercises how they saw fit. So if 20x man makers was rolled, then they could split it 20/20 or have one guy do 35 and the other 15. Bandcamp swiftly pointed out that it should be 35 and 5, and YHC with matched rapidity reminded everyone that he is not a professional.

So, having to do 20 man makers each should be relatively rare. And, yet, they were rolled 13 times by teams that recorded their pain.

Each team performed the set and could mark them down so that they could keep track of their randomized beatdowns. After each completed set, the teams would run across the parking lot (~50M) perform five big boy situps, then run back and roll again. We did this for the entire workout.

With five minutes left, and Divac rolling yet another 2, YHC called a ‘2’ for all the PAX and with 90 seconds left we carried our bells back to COT.

COT

Announcements
There’s probably a convergence on Thanksgiving
Join Slack
Read up on the Vasectomy Channel!
Read your newsletter

Prayers
YHC reminded everyone that the COT is a real trust, and that no one would be going home to talk about so and so to their M’s, and it should be considered a safe place. Went around the circle (starting with YHC) and asked each of the PAX to issue a praise or prayer, most chose praises.  My heart was warmed by the praises that were offered and we had a quick prayer before dispersing.

Always a pleasure to lead a workout.

The team’s sheets

Links to the photos in my google drive. Enjoy

https://photos.app.goo.gl/Te3AZzotv81cexq5A
https://photos.app.goo.gl/AbvHzjagrPdvNGu28
https://photos.app.goo.gl/Qxes3Wo4PaGQnKW78

** Last week Gears called this the “potato picker”. Pretty sure in the lexicon it’s “tappy taps”.  One of my goals will be to completely obscure this until it’s utterly recognizable to anyone outside fo the Fort.

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VQ at the Millstone with a Guillermo 1-2-3 Routine and the Presidential Wall of NoN-sEnSe

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The hype was huge, the turnout was moderate for Boss Hogg’s VQ at the Millstone. All 8 PAX in attendance got to enjoy the first day of cooler temperatures. 3 PAX went for a walk…2 with rucksacks and 1 with his arm in a sling. Huge T-Claps to Smithers for showing up while on the IR. The remaining 4 PAX followed the most Boss of all Hoggs on his VQ journey.

The Thang:

Mosey’d from Veteran’s Park to the parking lot across from Puckerbutt Pepper Company
• Stretched arms and legs
• 15 – Gas Pumpers (for my buddy Twister…Respect!)

Mosey’d to the St. John’s United Methodist Church parking lot
• Toy Soldiers across the parking lot – jogged back to starting side
• High Knees across the parking lot – jogged back to starting side
• Lunge Walks across the parking lot – jogged back to starting side
• Butt Kickers across the parking lot – jogged back to starting side
• Carioca across the parking lot and back in the opposite direction
• Shuffled across the parking lot and back in the opposite direction

Mosey’d to First Baptist Church of FM parking lot (home of Footloose!)
Circled up…
• 15 SSH
• 15 Windmills
• 15 Cherry Pickers
• 15 Imperial Walkers
• 15 Hillbilly Walkers

Mosey’d to FM Church of God parking lot
Next up was a Guillermo 1-2-3 routine. For those of you know don’t know (and I would be shocked if any of you didn’t already know this), Guillermo is Dora’s infant brother who does not fully grasp the concept of pairing PAX in 2’s and progressively moving from chest, to core, to legs. Guillermo likes to divide the entire population into two groups. The goal being that the exercising group works out together with focus on form, not speed. In concept, this was a great idea. Given that there were only 5 PAX participating in the Guillermo 1-2-3, one group included 3 PAX and the other included 2 PAX. The routine included:
• 100 Squats
• 200 LBCs
• 300 Overhead Claps
The group not performing exercises got to snake the stairs across the street.

Next up, was the Presidential Wall of Non-Sense! Don’t worry, there is nothing political behind this. The non-sense had to do with the exercise itself. PAX formed a line to begin the border wall. PAX were instructed to hold a tree via the Al Gore or by planking to form the wall. The HIM at beginning of the wall was instructed to run to the imaginary forest to gather more trees for the wall. Trees were knocked down via 1 burpee, 2 donkey kicks, or 3 Bobby Hurleys. Once the HIM obtained another tree from the imaginary forest, he returned to the end of the wall and held it in place via the Al Gore or by planking. The exercise continued until the wall crossed the parking lot.

Finally, with time running out, the PAX mall walked back to COT. The leader of the group dropped out of line to perform 1 burpee, 2 donkey kicks, or 3 Bobby Hurleys. Once completed, they rejoined the group at the back of the line. The process was repeated until COT was reached.

At the end of the workout, Boss Hogg was asked about his VQ experience.  He responded in the words of the great scholar Borat Sagdiyev, “Great Success!”.

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