Last Tuesday YHC’s phone made a strange noise, which I found was created by Polaroid, who wrote, “Are you ready and willing to Q The Tomahawk this Wednesday?”  Well, I’d been wondering for a while when I’d step up for my VQ, and that certainly made it easy to decide.

We started off with a quick mosey about the parking lot, followed by SSH, windmills, and a delightful exercise that I’ve been doing for over a decade which is called open tee position.  Everyone steps their right leg over their left so that the legs are crossed and your feet are about should width apart.  Then you sink down until your six is a few inches above the right ankle.  About 90% of your weight is now on your right leg which is bent at < 90º.  The left knee is hovering about an inch above the ground, and the left foot is out to the right, resting on the ball of the foot, ankle up.

So you hold that for 5-10 seconds, work up some shaking legs, then slap your hips as you straighten up, turn around and sink so your weight is on the left.  5-10 seconds   Do this 3-5 times each leg.

After the warmup we hit the six stations.  We got through three rounds of masculine singing (grunts and growls).  Below are the stations with the odd gear’s exercise explained as best I can.

1. BYO Kettlebell Woodchoppers x10/ea
2. Box jumps x10 (box dimensions: 20″x24″x30″)
3. Black Iron Staff (6′ long ~ 15lbs)
   1. One hand rotations x10/ea – Holding the staff horizontally with arm extended to the front, gripping the middle, fully rotate to the left and right, using your wrist to break and overcome the momentum
   2. Drop and lift x10/ea – Holding the staff vertically with arm to the front,  allow the top of the staff to drop to be parallel with the ground and use wrist strength to bring it back to fully vertical
   3. Drop and lift x10/ea – Holding the staff parallel to the ground, arm straight up (above the head), the long end of the staff extended behind the body, allow it to drop to vertical behind you and use wrist strength to pull it back to parallel with the ground
4. Bean bag o’ pain – (~9″x9″ canvas bag with ~25lbs of steel BBs)
   1. The same for all three rounds, hold the bag with one arm as far away as you can from your body, gripping it by its side (so you’re looking at a square). Toss it up a bit and catch it with your opposite hand, using only the fingertips, letting the tossing hand drop.  This gets awkward because the BBs get out of the way and you have nothing to grip after a second.  Repeat this x10/ea arm before dropping it to the ground and growling in victory.
5. Training Mace (10lb head)
   1. I like to call them Conan swings x10/ea- Holding the mace upright with right hand on top, do a full rotation above the head and strike out to the left.  Left elbow up, right is down.  Rotate back over the head and strike right, now the right elbow is up and the left elbow is down.  Switch hands and form for the other ten.
   2. Barbarian Squats – Holding the mace with hands together, resting behind your head like chopping wood with a maul, swing it over your head into a good squat, stopping with the mace upright and balance.  I like to switch my grip and do 10 with each hand on top
   3. Spears 10/ea – Or “Bayonet!”, standing with the mace, stab out like it’s a big old spear, holding it out for a two count.  Put your body into it
6. Kettlebell Swings – Geronimo offered to leave his 50 at station six, we all got a taste

After the first two rotations we stopped to sing the chorus, which like any good song, changes slightly every time.

1. On the six
   1. Gas Pumps x10
   2. LBCs with one leg crossed over the other x15/ea
2. On the six
   1. Windshield Wipers x15 – Bell in your hands, rotating opposite
   2. Windshield Wipers x15 – Bell in your hands, rotating opposite
3. On the feet
   1. Imperial Walker
   2. (blanking.. Hillbilly walker?)

With a few minutes left and the third rotation complete, we headed back to COT for some forearm stretching, announcements, and prayer.

Thanks again Polaroid for the opportunity to VQ on your turf.