Fish Tales with Birdcage

We had 9 at varsity (2 for IronPAX, 1 proctor, and 6 for a Cindy beatdown. Here’s what we did:

Warmup
– 10 Low Slow Swuats
– 10 Mountain Climbers
– 10 Windmills
Mosey to get a cinderblock

– 10 Manmakers
– 15 Curls
– 20 OH Press
– 25 Flutters with a Press
– 30 Cindy Swings
– 20 Squats
– 15 Skull Crushers
– 10 Sit-up to Press
– Jog to AO Jones

Repeat 2 more times

NMM
Below is an AI generated backblast about yesterday’s workout. Some of it is true.

The sun had yet risen where the flags would be, and the usual quiet was shattered by the sound of furious guitar riffs echoing across the lot. Rumbling Bald himself had decided that today was the day he would reinvent himself as a heavy metal solo act. His amps were cranked to eleven, his hair (which may or may not have been real) was blowing in the breeze, and every bird within a mile radius had fled in terror.

In a parking spot nearby, Birdcage was already five tall tales deep. “And that’s when Dark Helmet single-handedly wrestled a grizzly bear with a lightsaber and taught it calculus!” he boomed, waving his arms dramatically. Nobody was buying it, but everyone kept listening because Birdcage’s delivery was too good to ignore.

Time Machine, meanwhile, sat cross-legged on the asphalt, looking like he had aged a century overnight. “What am I doing with my life?” he muttered, staring off into the middle distance. “I mean, posting at Varsity? Was that really my legacy? Out of all possible timelines, why did I land there?” He sighed so deeply that Rumbling Bald’s double-bass pedal briefly went out of rhythm.

Finally, Spiderman dropped in from a nearby tree branch, landing with a thud. “Hey, uh, what’s all this?” he asked, eyeing the stack of cinderblocks Italian Job had been planning to incorporate into Bald’s stage show.

“Those,” Rumbling Bald growled, “are for dramatic effect. I need someone to swing them into the pit when the breakdown hits.”

Spiderman looked at the rocks, then back at Rumbling Bald, then immediately raised both hands. “Nope. Nope nope nope. Swinging heavy things is not in the contract.” With a single web-thwip, he was gone before anyone could argue.

Birdcage stood, puffed out his chest, and pointed dramatically toward the horizon. “Did I ever tell you about the time Dark Helmet built an entire stadium out of marshmallows just to host the galaxy’s first interstellar dodgeball championship?”

Time Machine groaned, Rumbling Bald shredded harder, and somewhere in the distance Spiderman was still muttering: “Nope. Not my job.”

And thus, the morning at NaFo ended the way all their gatherings did—half concert, half existential crisis, and entirely ridiculous.

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Partners, Light poles and Blimps

WARMUP: Mosey to the side of the school for exercises in cadence:
Windmills
Cherry pickers
Imperial walkers
Hillbilly walkers
Seal jacks
Side straddle hops

THE THANG: part 1 – partner up and either people’s chair or BTTW while partner 2 runs to the end of the lot and back. 3 rounds

Part 2 – Blimps at the light poles

At each pole pax added an exercise on the way up and dropped one on the way down. Burpees were never dropped – just because

5 – Burpees
10 – Lunges
15 – Incline Merkins
20 – Merkins (Modified to CDD’s on the downhill portion)
25 – Pulse squats AKA Monkey jumpers
30 – Squats

Two lessons from Seneca shared at the top of the hill

1 – we suffer more in our imagination than in reality

2 – he who suffers before it is necessary suffers more than is necessary.

How often in our lives do we let our perception of events influence us poorly? Our response is all we control – the event doesn’t care how we feel about it.

After 11 light poles worth of “fun”……back to COT

MARY: Just enough time for protractors and rosalitas with just a few hello dolly’s. That took pax to 0715
ANNOUNCEMENTS: Many – read your newsletter
COT: 5th core principle

Thanks for the call, Float Bridge. Honored to lead. :eye:

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Benevolence in the darkness

WARMUP:

• Side Straddle Hops (SSH):
• Imperial Walkers:
• Moroccan Nightclubs:
• Low Slow Squats
• Merkins
• Broga

THE THANG:
DORA

• 100 Merkins
• 200 Squats:
• 300 LBCs (Little Baby Crunches)

Perform each exercise for 45 seconds, 15 seconds rest/transition. Complete 2 rounds.
Exercises:
• Burpees
• Mountain Climbers:
• Plank Jacks
• Lunges:
• Flutter Kicks

Indian Run: caboose does 3 American Hammers then runs to the front

MARY:

Freddy mercuries
Gas pumper
Stretch and high knees

ANNOUNCEMENTS:
Bethel
Lunch
Golf outing
Bourbon and BBQ
Christmas Party
HIM Camp

COT: Vegas style

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Labor Day Beatdown

WARMUP: SSH, Windmill, Low slow squat, cherry pickers, Broga, Mosey
THE THANG: Sideline to sideline sprints x7
Merkins, wide arm merkins, diamond merkins, ranger merkins, hand release merkins, tempo merkins
And now for legs –
2 Rounds of..
10 burpee broad jumps, 20 yard lunges, 15 jump squats, Al Gore 30 seconds, 20 yard duck walk
To finish –
Flutters, Freddie Mercury, Hello dolly, American Hammer, Heels to Heaven, Plank
MARY:
ANNOUNCEMENTS:
COT: Keep showing up

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BHAG at the Hive

YHC was making up for a missed Q two weeks ago due to sickness. As I was reviewing previous backblasts, I came up with a Big Hairy Audacious Goal for the workout to circle the entire FMHS while carrying the KB with pain stations along the way. I hadn’t seen it done so that was the plan.

Weather was perfect. Felt like an early Fall and time for college football.

WARMUP:

SSH x 10
Windmills x 10
Merkins x 10
Arm Circles x 10

THE THANG:

With the BHAG of circling the school, which is approximately 1.5 miles, we moseyed stopping (4) times for the following:

21 KB swings
18 Upright rows
15 Goblet squats
12 Curls
9 Tricep extensions
6 Manmakers

MARY:

Finished at the end with a circuit of the following:

LBCs
Flutters

ANNOUNCEMENTS:

Read the newsletter

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Sofrito is made with cilantro

We had 10 @ the fastest AO in the East – <#C03NHG1RSS3> Some ran, some rucked, all enjoyed the perfect gloom weather and got stronger on the Holbrook route.

Thanks for the opportunity to run your great site, <@U05K5D10AG6>

Great work to these men, <@U063F72E8M9> <@U01E9QD5QQK> <@U061P7HUFRR> <@U050B5M1DGR> <@UGU3XR5RP> <@U06E4KT7NCA> <@U01BA80UZCY> <@U035XDY7ABC> <@U074CR7E49J>

THE THANG:
MARY:
ANNOUNCEMENTS:
COT:

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Stang Returns To The Ranch

WARMUP: 15 Hill Billy Walkers, 15 Windmills, 15 Moraccian Night Clubs
THE THANG: Mosey to speed bumps at Middle School Drop Off Line. Each exercise starts at 4 reps then goes up by 4’s to 20 reps with a different mode of transportation between each speed bump for duration of that exercise.
1.) Hand Release Merkins With Duck Walks
2.) Sumo Squats With Bear Crawl and Crawl Bear On Way Back
3.) Big Boys With Lt. Dans
4.) Boxcutters With Mosey

Moseyed Back To COT For 10 Minutes Of Stretching (Everyone’s Favorite)
MARY: Nope
ANNOUNCEMENTS: October 20th Leaders On The Links Golf Classic. Waterford Golf Course.
COT:

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