It was a warm dark morning, rain heavy as I drove to The Ranch. One of my personal favorite AOs in The Fort. Maybe becouse it is where I was the site Q for awhile or maybe just becouse there are lots of areas to torture people when I am on the Q.
I was first to arrive and wondered how many would join me in the rainy gloom. Couple cars roll in just before zero dark start time.
Disclaimer. Mosey around parking lot and get a quick warmup. SSHs, LBACs, windmills, IWs.
Mosey to front of middle school- partner up by benches- 20 derkins, 20 alternating stepups, 20 dips.
Partner wheel barrow to end of side walk and back. repeat x’s 3.
Mosey to back of school- chair sits in cadence- Balls to wall incadence- bearcrawl out to edge of parking lot and back- 3 sets.
Mosey to play ground- 3 sets 5 pullups, 10 merkins, 15 squats.
Mosey to bus loop- duck walks 10 diamond merkins, bunny hops 10 wide arm merkins, 1 leg jumps 5 pistol squats, switch to other leg repeat.
Mosey to COT.
announcements, prayers and praises.
Backdraft out.
Exicon of Catan
- QIC: 38 Special
- When: 10/30/2019
- Pax: 38 Special, Bear Grylls, moonshine, Otis, Zoolander
- Posted In: Pantheon
YHC snagged a second substi-Q this week at the Pantheon, which make’s a fella feel good.
I loved bringing the stupid fun Kettlebells of Catan to the Armory two days ago, that I decided to bring it to a bootcamp. The hardest part was coming up with the name, which only occurred to me as I was tweet-toring the count and uploading the video this morning.
5 PAX braved the tiny droplets of rain this morning to get better. Started with the disclaimer and some introductions to PAX that were new to YHC.
The warmup
Then the half mile mosey around the school, with a stop for SSH, “Lego” pickers, merkins, Moroccan night clubs, and mountain climbers. Finished our mosey at the first light under the awning were there was a small box with two dice, pens, and paper.
The Thang
Today’s workout list
We all started with the same roll, which came up 7. The PAX were to finish the set, run down and around to the sign (by the end of the fence) and do 5 big boy situps, run back, and roll again.
What happened was that if the PAX arrived back at the start simultaneously, they’d just do the same exercise, which was awesome because shared pain is half the pain. This went on for roughly 35 minutes. YHC was pleased to hear a lot of panting, encouragement, and mumblechatter.
With five minutes left everyone gathered at the starting point and YHC “rolled a mental two”. Everyone did 15 burpees, ran to the end for 10 BBSU and back to the start, whence the clock hit 0600.
A few seconds later we were in COT. Moonshine had to roll.
Announcements involved the likely Thanksgiving day convergence and reading of the newsletter. Bear Grylls also reminded the PAX to try to sign up for Watch D.O.G.S. at Tega Cay Elem if you can (on a personal note, this is how one might go from PAX to HIM).
Praises were offered and the PAX dispersed.
It was a most excellent morning to be outside. Here are the results as promised:
https://photos.app.goo.gl/5sUFWkGo9NxyxDXU7
https://photos.app.goo.gl/eFrBHKmMSaLBg4gr9
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The Kettlebell Tolls for Thee, at Cannonball
Wheel of Man Makers
Ohhh Milk!
- QIC: UHaul
- When: 10/23/2019
- Pax: #F3_Polaroid, 3D, Band Camp, Birdcage, Scrum, Slash, Smokey, Sugar Bug, Training wheels, Uhaul
- Posted In: The Snake Pit
The gloom was upon us as we watched our former brothers @F3_Polaroid and @birdcage_f3 ran away out of unadulterated fear and loathing to find a safer path known as Whites Road…
A custom playlist was created for this one, along with fully laminated and Snake Pit logo’d work out stations, as per usual for a UHaul led workout.
The PAX arrived once again to the rockish crooning of Bob Seger’s Like a Rock to put us in the mood for strong, unbothered by responsibility, handsome younger versions of ourselves that probably never existed outside of our own Sad Clown younger selves, but I digress…
Warm ups were had by all while Maroon 5 played us a Wake Up Call so we could limber up for the pain stations which would be 3 in number to allow for a rotational situation… Two groups of 3 and one group of 2 would cycle through…
Station
- Standing Shoulder Press x20 while others executed Hello Dolly or Box Cutters, switch, repeat… White and Nerdy – Weird Al
- Kettle Bell Swings x25 while others executed Air Dramas until their legs or sphincter gave out, switch, repeat… All Summer Long – Kidd Rock
- Hammer Curls x25 while others pretended to do as many Shoulder Taps as possible, switch, repeat… Jump – Van Halen
- That anger management candidate Malcolm showed up again to chase PAX around while they tried peacefully to carry their bell above their head…
- Skull Crushers x25 while others whose sphincters had recovered did Low Slow Squats, switch, repeat… Fat Bottomed Girls – Queen
- The UHaul in cadence x10 while others executed copious numbers of Plank Jacks, switch, repeat… Down Under – Men At Work
- Laying Press x20 while others hammered out American Hammers until their abs twitched, switch, repeat… You Shook Me All Night Long – AC/DC
- Malcolm shows up again…
- PAX are freed to choose their next exercise and all merely move to the next station as they would have if they were not freed… Shut Up and Drive – Rihanna which I believe I skipped to get to I Want You to Want Me – Letters to Cleo
- PAX collected for Laying Chest Press x25 and Sumo Deadlifts in an alternating fashion while Rodney Atkins reminded us that If You’re Going Through Hell you should just keep on going because you might get out before the Devil knows you’re there… It didn’t work, the rinse/repeat cycle was fully engaged and no one escaped…
- As has become the tradition at UHaul led workouts, the PAX gathered for 5 minutes of Mary while R.E.M. drove home the point that Everybody Hurts and it doesn’t stop until 0600.
Name O Rama included a strange outburst from @hunteregnor that you should watch…
Announcements, Praises and Prayers were shared by all…
https://twitter.com/F3_UHaul/status/1186954000463212544?s=20
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Music, Lamination and a Chainsaw at the Armory
You want me to take that coupon to the top of that hill HOW??
Nine at the Hive
Kettlebells of Catan
YHC is quite thankful for the opportunity to Q the Armory. I’d been avoiding bells for a while to try to up my running game and down my BMI game, and throwing a bell in the back of the car gave me that warm, familiar feeling…
Rolled into the parking lot and saw an impressive fleet of vehicles in the gloom. Quickly dropped off my small box of goodies and joined the pax just in time to disclaim that I’m no professional.
Warm Up
Things started off with a quarter mile mosey around the parking lot. Followed by some SSH, zucchini** pickers, merkins, mountain climbers, and windmills. Then grab the bells and head to the NE lot where my box of stuff was.
What’s In The Box?
After we paired up I pulled out the box’s contents. 4 pens (all I could find this morning) two dice from my wife’s copy of Settler’s of Catan, and 8 sheets of paper.
Math? Really…?
Stats, yeah… If you’re familiar with the distribution of a die roll of 2 six sided dice, you’ll see why rolling 2 and 12 are particularly painful, the odds are 1/36 for each, while rolling a 7 is 1/6. Let’s look at the bell curve (more of a triangle).
This is the core game mechanic in the game Setttler’s of Catan. Using probability along with some randomness, the game rewards people 5/6ths of the time and punishes them 1/6th of the time. YHC thought long and hard on how to include that mechanic in our morning workout, but decided on loyalty to the beatdown. Perhaps later more will be added to that 7 roll.
Enough of that noise…
Back to the Thang, the least likely rolls were assigned the more difficult tasks, while the more probable rolls had tasks that PAX could more readily repeat. Each sheet was identical:
2. 20x man makers
3. 20x upright rows
4. 10x man makers
5. 8x each/16x both arm curls
6. 10x goblet squats
7. 15x swings
8. 20x chest press
9. 8x each plank row
10. 20x dead lift
11. 5x each Turkish get up
12. 20x man makers
YHC quickly explained that every team was to roll the dice, and the roll dictated the exercise they were to do. The counts on the paper were per person, not per team. A team was free to divide the exercises how they saw fit. So if 20x man makers was rolled, then they could split it 20/20 or have one guy do 35 and the other 15. Bandcamp swiftly pointed out that it should be 35 and 5, and YHC with matched rapidity reminded everyone that he is not a professional.
So, having to do 20 man makers each should be relatively rare. And, yet, they were rolled 13 times by teams that recorded their pain.
Each team performed the set and could mark them down so that they could keep track of their randomized beatdowns. After each completed set, the teams would run across the parking lot (~50M) perform five big boy situps, then run back and roll again. We did this for the entire workout.
With five minutes left, and Divac rolling yet another 2, YHC called a ‘2’ for all the PAX and with 90 seconds left we carried our bells back to COT.
COT
Announcements
There’s probably a convergence on Thanksgiving
Join Slack
Read up on the Vasectomy Channel!
Read your newsletter
Prayers
YHC reminded everyone that the COT is a real trust, and that no one would be going home to talk about so and so to their M’s, and it should be considered a safe place. Went around the circle (starting with YHC) and asked each of the PAX to issue a praise or prayer, most chose praises. My heart was warmed by the praises that were offered and we had a quick prayer before dispersing.
Always a pleasure to lead a workout.
The team’s sheets
Links to the photos in my google drive. Enjoy
https://photos.app.goo.gl/Te3AZzotv81cexq5A
https://photos.app.goo.gl/AbvHzjagrPdvNGu28
https://photos.app.goo.gl/Qxes3Wo4PaGQnKW78
** Last week Gears called this the “potato picker”. Pretty sure in the lexicon it’s “tappy taps”. One of my goals will be to completely obscure this until it’s utterly recognizable to anyone outside fo the Fort.
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