Preparation at the Armory

19 PAX at The Armory

Workout is pretty clear from the outline I think.

We ran a bit in between the reps for the Thang…..at an allegedly fast pace….pretty sure it was slow on the Fish Sticks scale. Also we did 60 SSH….a real crowd pleaser. Alternating between Mtn Climbers and a Yoga sequence over and over and over was also “well” received.

I did use my handy cheat codes on my forearms to keep myself on task. It’s cheaper than buying one of those quarterback play-caller wrist bands like OldBay has, but decidedly less cool. Forgot what DD (Downdog) stood….But on a Mosey Shady reminded me; at which point, I was glad for his assistance and that we’d already done that sequence in the warmup.

Mary to close out:
– Windshield Wipers
– Flutters
– restarted the Thang from 5 reps and built up (crowd pleaser) got to 10
– Pigeon Lunge

COT

NMM:
Advent is about Preparation. How are we preparing ourselves daily to handle our Jester(s) beyond just fitness?

Thanks to JWOWW for the invitation to Q. Great to have such a group of HIM present.

Band Camp Dismissed

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Site vs Site

Well the Site vs Site was CRAZY good thanks to some excellent leadership on both sides of the workout. 0500 launch, 6 Q’s (3 from fire ant, 3 from golden corral) took 10 minutes each. Lutefisk forgot how to flip a coin but managed to have it land in favor of fire ant going first.  The first fire ant Q was Router who took us through a ruck run/pain station. Next up was golden corral’s first Q Mile High who took us on a sprint-fest in the back of HT with some wall work on the legs. Fire ant Q #2 was Cha Ching who put us through some nasty ruck reps.  Golden corral put Bones in charge of some repeating leg work by the green olive – some funky squat jumps that didn’t feel good.  Spiderman finished the fire ant lineup with a terrible idea of bear crawl/crawl bear for what seemed like eternity while the partner did reps with the ruck.  Lutefisk finished it up with the final golden corral Q by starting, and staying, in the plank position for the duration of his 10 minutes.  Dark Helmet notable threw in the towel and to make himself feel better he poked the Q.  I will not forget.  Welcome FNG Thigh Master (not Jane Fonda) but he’s from New York so evidently it’s OK to drop F-bombs whenever and wherever.  All in all 30 PAX came out for a nasty beatdown that was surely a crowd pleaser.  It was an honor to be a part of it and special thank you to the Q’s for stepping up and all of you ruckers for bringing us some extra gear to use.

Final tally of the votes: Fire Ant 15, Golden Corral 11, Tie 3, Bonsai = disqualified for his answer

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Pastor of Pain makes a visit in the Armory

YHC was asked to Q at the Armory by a HIM named JWOW and I jumped at the request. I am use to Kettlebells and love Qing them. Today I brought with me a WO that was recently Q’d at my home AO #Cannonball by Survey Says! and I named it the Pastor of Pain after him.

We started with a basic COP with some SSH, Sun Gods and Cherry Pickers. We then headed to the cones I had set up but stopped briefly before them to get in some curls, Tri extensions, Bell Jax and big boys with a bell push over the knees. Nobody like the bell jax. We then eventually made it to where I had a few cones set up about 4 parking space’s apart from each other and began:

The Thang was basically a ladder:
Begin at Cone 1 with 10 Man Makers then Broad Jump with the Bell in hand to the second Cone and do 10 Snatches then Broad Jump to the third cone and do 10 Turkish Getups then overhead bell mosey all the way back to the first cone.
Start at Cone 1 again with 20 Wood Choppers Lunge to the second cone and do 20 overhead bell Presses Lunge to the third cone and do 20 Bell Swings then overhead bell mosey all the way back to the first cone.
Start at Cone 1 again with 30 Goblet Squats Bear Crawl to the second cone and do 30 Curls then Bear Crawl to the third cone and do 30 Bell Merkins then overhead bell carry mosey all the way back to the first cone.

Repeat the Thang again in Backwards order starting with the 30 reps segment.

We had a little time still left over so we knocked out some more Curls, Triceps extensions and big boys with a bell push over the knees. We left off the bell jax fortunately. They suck.

Got to meet a few new PAX and that is why I always like Qing and different AO’s. Found the HIM that bought my breakfast last Christmas (Spitz) and thanked him again.

Finished up with a COT (announcements, a few prayers -Apache and Cash and Kenyan-and praises and all thankful for another day).

Thanks for the opportunity to lead JWOW

I am enjoying this ride I am on and am not sure where it is taking me but all we can do is prepare and train.

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12 Days of Christmas

Today at the Ranch I had the pleasure of leading nine men in a 12 days of Christmas Beatdown. I know its a week before Thanksgiving but like everyone else we will skip to Christmas.

We started with a warm up of Windmills, Tappy Taps, SSH and Moroccan NC and then we moseyed to the back playground for some real fun.

Our 12 Days of Christmas :

1 BURPEE

2 MERKINS

3 SQUATS

4 MOUNTAIN CLIMBERS

5 BIG BOY’S

6 FLUTTERS

7 DIAMOND MERKINS

8 LBC’S

9 BOX CUTTERS

10 CDD

11 AMERICAN HAMMERS

12 WIDE ARM MERKINS

OH!!  I forgot there was a lap around the loop after every day. There was some singing and some complaining as well.

We ended with some Mary and Two Ruckers joined us for  COT!!

Thanks Jiffy for letting me lead these fine men.

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8 Extra Pounds

Twelve of Fort Mill’s finest met at the Harris Teeter on a perfect late fall morning.  While two set off for a ruck workout, the other 10 joined YHC and here is what they did:

Take a big loop around the HT parking lot and meet up at the white VW near the back of the lot.  Everyone pick up two bricks and mosey to the Green Olive Grille for COP:

Circle up and drop your bricks for SSH x 25 and 10 windmills.  Pick up your bricks and everyone in cadence for:  merkin x 10, squat x 15, imperial walker x 20, jump squat x 10, LBC x 20, hello dolly x 20, American hammer x 20 , diamond merkin x 10, Morrocan nightclub x 20.

Mosey to the back of the main parking lot, put your bricks into a pile, and then mosey to the front of Harris Teeter (about 50 yds).   Form two groups of 5.   The first group runs to the pile, picks up a brick, and runs back to the start point.  The second group does the same.  Rinse and repeat and until all the bricks are moved.   Once all the bricks are moved, repeat with two bricks per person and move the bricks to the start point (full disclosure – this was not how this was supposed to go!)

Mosey back to Green Olive grille and circle up for Jack Webb  (1:4).   We got to 7 merkins and 28 overheads with bricks before YHC’s form started to fail.

ABLAB with bricks:

Flying flutter x 20, V-up x 10, Superman hold x 3, X’s and O’s x 10.  Close with the body destroyer.

COT

I’ve been away from this AO for a while and it was good to see many new faces this morning.  What perfect weather for a boot camp!  Dark Helmut and Olaf provided the usual chatter  – thank you, gentlemen.    It was a pleasure to lead the Pax today and I hope you enjoyed the workout.

Announcements, Prayers, Praises:

Read your newsletter:   Saturday convergence at The Fort, Thanksgiving convergence, Xmas party all coming up.

Prayers for:  Kenyan and his family, a family member with recurring cancer, Olaf on his Spartan race.

 

 

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A cool, Shady, 38 degree Special morning

11 PAX woke up on a cool Saturday morning in November of 2019. Little did any of them know that immediately after the disclaimer they would be headed for the much maligned Tega Cay Drive hill of pain.

The mosey immediately headed that way as YHC (38 Special) led the PAX down the hill. Everyone circled up for 25 SSH, 15 Low Slow Squats, and 15 mountain climbers.  Some good Saturday morning mumblechatter including some compliments about the length of certain PAX’s shorts and the decade in which they might have been procured.  That was plenty “warm up”.

The Thang: Part 1

PAX counted off by 2’s. 2’s were instructed to run the 150M hill backwards. Team 1 to lag behind so eyes were going forward and backward. YHC was pleased to hear Team 1 offer quality mumblechatter on the way up in the way of encouragement.

At the top of the hill, everyone ran back down and Team 1 took their turn to run backwards while Team 2 pulled mumblechatter duty.  Now that every quad was suitably inflamed it was time for phase two of part one.

Until YHC’s time was out, we would run 11’s.  Starting behind the western baseball diamond, double count stepups. Run the roughly 100m to to the benches just before the pullup bars and do burpees.  If, somehow, anyone were to finish, it would have added 2k to their bragging rights. Some got to 4 step ups left, others 6.

YHC used the last minute of his time to speak briefly about pushing oneself in order for the group. The above was selected not because I could kill it, but because I knew I could do it with commitment, and without killing myself, and sorta, maybe tried to encourage others to do the same.

The Thang: Part 2

Shady took over and wasted no time running the PAX over the baseball field and into the parking lot, stopping near the playground.  Everyone paired up for what Shady said would be your ‘basic’ Dora. There was a brief lament about the lack of bricks when one of the PAX brought to everyone’s attention that there were some large rocks at the bottom of the trail.

If YHC were a geologist, he’d have called these rocks “boulders” (any rock with a diameter of > 25.6cm)…

Run back up the trail and into the playground.  Round one of the Dora was
100 – Hand Release Merkins
200 – Shoulder (boulder) Press
300 – Flutter

YHC wants to point out that the first two parts of that set were brutal.

When the set was over, Shady spoke to the PAX about his word of the year and encouraged everyone to think about theirs again. Some of the PAX talked briefly about their words as well. After this 10 count was concluded it was time to move onto round two.
100 – Incline rows
200 – Boulder curls
300 – LBC

YHC would also like to point out that the incline rows, while being sufficiently difficult, made some of the PAX look utterly ridiculous, and as most of us know, PAX would allow any of their brothers to look that ridiculous without drawing a great deal of attention to the fact.  It’s just good manners.

Time ran out during the LBCs and there was one more run down into the woods to return their boulders to their homes.  Joined up at COT.

Announcements: Thanksgiving convergence on 11/28 @The Ranch, HTL convergence on 11/23 @WEP and the Christmas Party 12/6 ~Baxter area. Everyone who knows Kenyan is invited to join the celebration of Life for his departed wife that morning.

There were also some prayers and praises lifted up to Sky Q’s consideration.

The PAX dispersed…

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Kettlebells of Catan

YHC is quite thankful for the opportunity to Q the Armory. I’d been avoiding bells for a while to try to up my running game and down my BMI game, and throwing a bell in the back of the car gave me that warm, familiar feeling…

Rolled into the parking lot and saw an impressive fleet of vehicles in the gloom.  Quickly dropped off my small box of goodies and joined the pax just in time to disclaim that I’m no professional.

Warm Up

Things started off with a quarter mile mosey around the parking lot. Followed by some SSH, zucchini** pickers, merkins, mountain climbers, and windmills.  Then grab the bells and head to the NE lot where my box of stuff was.

What’s In The Box?

After we paired up I pulled out the box’s contents. 4 pens (all I could find this morning) two dice from my wife’s copy of Settler’s of Catan, and 8 sheets of paper.

Math? Really…?

Stats, yeah… If you’re familiar with the distribution of a die roll of 2 six sided dice, you’ll see why rolling 2 and 12 are particularly painful, the odds are 1/36 for each, while rolling a 7 is 1/6.  Let’s look at the bell curve (more of a triangle).

This is the core game mechanic in the game Setttler’s of Catan.  Using probability along with some randomness, the game rewards people 5/6ths of the time and punishes them 1/6th of the time.  YHC thought long and hard on how to include that mechanic in our morning workout, but decided on loyalty to the beatdown. Perhaps later more will be added to that 7 roll.

Enough of that noise…

Back to the Thang, the least likely rolls were assigned the more difficult tasks, while the more probable rolls had tasks that PAX could more readily repeat. Each sheet was identical:

2. 20x man makers
3. 20x upright rows
4. 10x man makers
5. 8x each/16x both arm curls
6. 10x goblet squats
7. 15x swings
8. 20x chest press
9. 8x each plank row
10. 20x dead lift
11. 5x each Turkish get up
12. 20x man makers

YHC quickly explained that every team was to roll the dice, and the roll dictated the exercise they were to do.  The counts on the paper were per person, not per team. A team was free to divide the exercises how they saw fit. So if 20x man makers was rolled, then they could split it 20/20 or have one guy do 35 and the other 15. Bandcamp swiftly pointed out that it should be 35 and 5, and YHC with matched rapidity reminded everyone that he is not a professional.

So, having to do 20 man makers each should be relatively rare. And, yet, they were rolled 13 times by teams that recorded their pain.

Each team performed the set and could mark them down so that they could keep track of their randomized beatdowns. After each completed set, the teams would run across the parking lot (~50M) perform five big boy situps, then run back and roll again. We did this for the entire workout.

With five minutes left, and Divac rolling yet another 2, YHC called a ‘2’ for all the PAX and with 90 seconds left we carried our bells back to COT.

COT

Announcements
There’s probably a convergence on Thanksgiving
Join Slack
Read up on the Vasectomy Channel!
Read your newsletter

Prayers
YHC reminded everyone that the COT is a real trust, and that no one would be going home to talk about so and so to their M’s, and it should be considered a safe place. Went around the circle (starting with YHC) and asked each of the PAX to issue a praise or prayer, most chose praises.  My heart was warmed by the praises that were offered and we had a quick prayer before dispersing.

Always a pleasure to lead a workout.

The team’s sheets

Links to the photos in my google drive. Enjoy

https://photos.app.goo.gl/Te3AZzotv81cexq5A
https://photos.app.goo.gl/AbvHzjagrPdvNGu28
https://photos.app.goo.gl/Qxes3Wo4PaGQnKW78

** Last week Gears called this the “potato picker”. Pretty sure in the lexicon it’s “tappy taps”.  One of my goals will be to completely obscure this until it’s utterly recognizable to anyone outside fo the Fort.

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School Loops

Temporary location change to Tega Cay Elementary School.

Route:  Stay on school grounds, big loop around the back of the school.  At the crosswalk, fast lap around the soccer field.  Small loop around parking lot, then repeat with big loop around school.  One lap was a little over a mile.

We got 4 laps in..good for a bunch of old guys.

Happy Birthday to Mrs.  Gears!

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Crossroads – Cost of Marriage

What did it take to purchase an engagement ring?

  • Story of a guy living on Tuna sandwiches in order to save enough money to purchase an engagement ring. The moral is not working hard and saving, but what is the cost to express your love?

Average Wedding costs $27k

  • What are the real costs of marriage?
    It costs more than money, wedding, ring, honeymoon–àCost you yourself
    Ephesians 5:25: “For husbands, this means love your wives, just as Christ loved the church. He gave up his life for her.”
  • What was the largest or biggest sacrifice in your mind for your marriage?
    Career
    Ambition
  • What has been gained by being married
    Love
    Children
    Legacy
  • Have you ever said, “I shouldn’t be with someone if I’m not happy?”
    This is self-centered, shallow and reflection of our culture
    Not part of Vows taken
    We probably all go into our “wedding” thinking man I’m Happy, but have we thought about how short sighted that is??
  • Marriage is about love which is something we CHOOSE
    It is represented by sacrifice, serving, giving, forgiving over and over and over
    It’s called Commitment because it does not = personal happiness but LOVE (giving)

1 Corinthians 13:13: “And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love.”
CHOOSE LOVE
1 Peter 4:8: “Above all, love each other deeply, because love covers over a multitude of sins.”
No matter what happens, CHOOSE LOVE as it covers the mess
John 15:12: “My command is this: Love each other as I have loved you.”
Back to Ephesians 5:25

  • What does this look like in application
    It’s about offering forgiveness when you’ve been hurt.
    It’s about giving your time though it’s not always convenient.
    It’s about sharing your heart when you’d rather hold back.
    It’s about cleaning the kitchen after a long weekend, even if it’s your least favorite job.
    It’s about choosing to respond with love when you’d rather respond in anger.
    It’s about offering a listening ear, when you’d rather tune out or go to bed.
    It’s about putting someone else’s needs and desires before your own.
    It’s about giving up that last bite of cake, just so your spouse can enjoy it.
    It’s about laying down your rights, to make way for the rights of another.

Formula:
You before Me – not sometimes, not weekends, ALL THE TIME
We before I – even with the kids, job, hobbies

  • The world despises the sacrificial side of marriage
    strive for power, control and the upper hand in a relationship
    do what feels right
    that love is about doing what makes us happy
    if we feel less than happy, they encourage us to bail, to abandon ship and to stop investing
    Mark 10:9: “Therefore what God has joined together let no one separate.”

God’s plan = more we give, the better we become
Real love is not self-seeking, and it will always cost you
It will cost your heart, your time and your money
It will cost your comfort, your rights and your pride
It will cost you to “lay down your life” for the life of another
And only those who learn to die to themselves are the ones who get to experience the resurrection power that comes with it—resurrection into real love, into real life, and into meaningful relationships.

Romans 12:10: “Be devoted to one another in love. Honor one another above yourselves.”

  • Marriage is a reflection of our relationship towards God, bride of Christ
    1:1
    He died for us, so we can live
    He leads us to resurrection life
    Love like No Other
    1 Peter 3:7: “In the same way, you husbands must give honor to your wives. Treat your wife with understanding as you live together. She may be weaker than you are, but she is your equal partner in God’s gift of new life. Treat her as you should so your prayers will not be hindered.”
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VQ-O-RAMA

September is VQ month at Golden Corral.  Except last minute VQ decided he wasn’t ready.  Push a brother, but not too much.  It’s ok, Lutefisk can ad-lib!  Normal disclaimer plus let PAX know we all would be on Q today.  Something they did from their VQ.  Started off with a mosey around the Teeter, circle up for a COP:
-10 windmills IC
-10 DC merkins IC
-15 imperial walkers IC
-10 tempo merkins IC
-15 morrocan NC’s IC
-10 diamond merkins IC
-line up for a modified indian run; hold plank, rear PAX bear crawl to front

Lutefisk’s Thang: SSH during the song “Tubthumping” by Chumbawumba, every “I GET KNOCKED DOWN” = burpee

Mile High’s Thang: Wall sit and one at a time sprint about 50 yards and back, various arm work whilst wall sitting

Fish Stick’s Thang: tight circle arms on shoulders, one at a time 10 count heel raises (9 PAX = 90 heal raises!)

Corn Hole’s Thang: 12 count merkin (4 down, 4 hold 6″, 4 up) x 10

Uber’s Thang: wall work behind oil change place – 10 right leg step ups, 10 left leg step ups, 10 derkins, 20 dips

38 Special’s Thang: Some kung fu stuff that was awkward and used muscles I didn’t know existed.  noice

Deacon’s Thang: high knees in place, and whenever he felt like it, yelled “DOWN” for a burpee. over and over and over and over and over

Change Order’s Thang: 2 groups, one does pull-ups on the cart rack until the other gets back. flapjack

Crab Cake’s Thang: various ground work followed by a sprint up and back

Just enough time for 9 double count crunchy frogs to end it.  COT.

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