Challenged to “Bring It”

A few months ago, Dark Helmet and I were challenged to “bring it” to The Deep. I’m not sure how I got roped into the conversation as I no longer provide the top-tier workouts I used to. You see, it’s not because I’ve gotten soft (well, maybe a little), it’s more due to the physical acceleration of the PAX, which is evident when I cross the water and see the brothers in Lake Wylie. My workouts aren’t as hard as they used to be for some.

That said, I’ve become known for 2 things: the deck of cards and cinder blocks. I couldn’t disappoint the fellas. Dark Helmet on the other hand, is known for many things (not including many leather-bound books, rich mahogany, a perfect quaff or starbuck-y hands). And, with these many things, he brought his level of creative, pain-inducing exercises to the first half of the morning’s Q.

Once DH signed a few autographs, gave a very clear disclaimer, he took off for the warm up mosey. Then did a few warm-up-type exercises which included all the regulars and plenty of chatter.

Grab a partner and since when does size not matter…in Wheelbarrow racing?

You and your partner will alternate wheelbarrow’ing around the circle which I swear, grew as we were encircling it.

Next, grab the cinder blocks from Maximus’ truck for a little DORA activity.

Partner 1 (P1) would run around the main lot while Partner 2 (P2) would do the exercise then flapjack for:

200 Bicep Curls

300 Overhead Press

400 Bent-Over Rows (modified the count for timing and inserted chest press)

Hand off to Maximus for more partner work

P1: Ski Abs

P2: Toe Taps on the block (25ea side)

Flapjack

P1: Burpee Broad Jump ~50yds & NUR back

P2: Mountain Climbers with your hands on the block

Flapjack

P1: Beep Beep I’m a Jeep for 25yds & Lunge Walk back

P2: Bomb Jacks

Flapjack

Now with both partners at one end and the block at the other:

P1: Sprint to the block, 10 Man Makers with the block, Sprint Back

P2: Flutters from the V-up position

Next up, partner big-boy sit-ups while passing the block back and forth

I can’t fully recall if we did a few 8ct burpees to finish it off but it’d be a lot cooler if we did…so let’s assume we did.

Hey PAX, wherever you call home, go somewhere different. Organize a clown car with a few other locals and go see a different AO on a Saturday and attend their Q-Source. You never know what you’ll learn. Dark Helmet and I appreciate the opportunity to put ourselves through misery in the spirit of Qing for a great group of F3’s finest PAX.

Until Next Time.

DH & MAX

TClap |
2

August 2018 – Impact Convergence

On the morning of Friday, August 3rd, 61 Men of High Impact joined Homebrew, Deacon, & Jiffy for some #Convergence work.

For this Round Robin of Pain, we separated the PAX into 3 groups and rotated to each station for 12 minutes.

Station 1 – Jiffy:

He had setup a row of 4 cones in the bank parking lot and ran the PAX through the following exercises.

  • 5 Burpees OYO
  • Straight suicides
  • Lunge walk, 10 squats at each cone
  • Bear crawl, 10 merkins at each cone
  • 15 American Hammers in cadence
  • Suicides with 3 Bomb Jacks at each cone
  • Broad jump to each cone, 5 lunges each leg
  • Crab walk, 5 diamond merkins at each cone
  • 15 LBC’s in cadence

Station 2 – Deacon:

Find a partner

One partner runs to Pizza Hut and back while the other does a series of exercises until the team does merkins (100x), Squats (200x), LBCs (300x).

  • Partner Drills (Round 1) – Partner Big Boy Sit Ups (15x for 2 rounds), Partners Push Ups (15x for 2 rounds), Partner Leg Lifts (15x for 2 rounds)
  • Partner Drills (Round 2 if time permits) – Partner Wheel Barrels to each side of the parking lot (2x for 2 rounds), Partner Ski Jumps (15x for 2 rounds)

Station 3 – Homebrew:

4 Corners and Burpee Roll

PAX were divided into four groups, with one group being sent to each corner. Complete all exercises listed at your corner then bear crawl to the center. At the center was a large foam die. One PAX would roll the die for the group to determine how may burpees everyone would do. Amazingly, only one 6 was rolled all morning – I’m lookin at you IceT. Once the burpees were completed, crab walk from the center to the next corner going clockwise. Rinse and repeat until all corners are done or time runs out.

  • Corner 1
    • 40 SSH
    • 40 Plank Jacks
    • 40 Mountain Climbers
    • 20 Crab Cakes
  • Corner 2
    • 15 Merkins
    • 30 CDD
    • 15 Wide Arm Merkins
    • 5 Kraken Burpees
  • Corner 3
    • 10 Donkey Kicks
    • 50 Calf Raises
    • 40 Monkey Humpers
    • 20 Lunges
  • Corner 4
    • 10 Big Boy Situps
    • 20 Hello Dollys
    • 30 Dying Cockroaches (double count)
    • 10 Boxcutters

There were prayer requests for family, school returning and those with health needs.

Cakeboss took us out in prayer.

Great job, Homebrew, Deacon, & Jiffy!

– Ginsu

TClap |
2

Dice Dice Baby

After being on IR for a month, YHC was finally back in the game and got to (at last) Q at Bermuda Triangle. We had a couple of late comers, but the final count was 7 PAX.

Disclaimer made.

Jog around the track to the basketball court then circle up for COP.

SSH, MNC, Merkins, Windmills, Crab Cakes… probably forgetting some other stuff.

The Thang

Moseyed to the large traffic circle where PAX

·         Bear crawled around circle, then 7 worst-merkins-ever

·         Crab walked around the circle, then 20 crab cakes

·         Bear crawled around circle, then 7 worst-merkins-ever

Easy to write, hard to do. This traffic circle is no joke.

Die of Doom

I really need a better name for this one. But the night before the Q, Die of Doom was all I could come up with. PAX moseyed to the far side of the school where a whiteboard and novelty foam die had been set up. Reps for each of the 12 rounds were predetermined: 10, 20, 30, 40, 50, 60 then 60, 50, 40, 30, 20, 10. The die roll determined the exercise. Each round a PAX would roll the die for the group (resulting in cheers or groans), everyone would do the corresponding exercise for the assigned reps OYO, then run to the end of the parking lot and back. Rinse and repeat until all 12 rounds are complete.

Die values:

1 = LBCs

2 = SSH

3 = Dips

4 = Merkins

5 = Monkey Humpers

6 = Burpees

 

Lady Luck was definitely in a burpee mood that Friday as we rolled burpees on the ascending 50… then rolled burpees on the descending 50 again. At least she stayed away from burpees on the 60 rep rounds. The distribution of the exercises was surprisingly even – not the reps, but the variety in rolled numbers. We ended up having to cut things short in the 8th round as we were quickly approaching 5:45. YHC will have to budget more time for this in the future. Mosey back to COT.

 

Great to be back in the gloom getting sharpened by you men. Being on IR sucks, so don’t forget to reach out to PAX who are injured. The 2nd and 3rd F stuff shouldn’t stop just because you can’t post to a workout.

Stay classy,

Homebrew

TClap |
1

Anniversary Q & Lake Wylie Pub Tour

One year ago I posted for the first time at F3. Unlike most men in F3 I was not EH’d by a friend, coworker, or relative. I was EH’d by a podcast. I listened to the episode (link below) while I was at work, and by the end I knew I had to see what this F3 thing was all about. I posted the next day. Not because I was excited to wake up early, or to walk up and hang out in a group where I knew no one (fellow introverts, you know what I’m talking about). I posted the next day because I knew if I didn’t post right away I never would. At the time, I was not even sure I could do 10 pushups. But I was a textbook example of a Sad Clown, and I thought “Well, if this is a dumpster fire I just won’t come back.” I got smoked at that first workout, and it was great. I went to 2nd F drinks that night, posted again the next morning, and posted to CNW2 right after. All 3 Fs in the first 26 hours of showing up – I was hooked.

Podcast #324: How Fitness, Fellowship, and Faith Are the Cure for Sad Clown Syndrome

Today marked the anniversary of my first post. So I did a reprise of that first workout, which was originally Q’d by Kenyan.

The Thang
Disclaimer disclaimed. We found out that Witch Hunt had stepped on a piece of glass during a pre-run and that a policeman had given him hand sanitizer (foot sanitizer?) for the wound. He still did the full workout with a bleeding foot #ManPoints

Run to Copper Pub – Big boy sit-ups until 6
* The PAX saw what appeared to be Respectable Olaf getting a ticket by the Foot Sanitizing Policeman. Sources later confirmed that the offender was not Olaf but a similarly dressed doppelganger who also drives a red pickup. What are the odds?

COP
• SSH
• Merkins
• Mountain climbers
• Plank jacks

* 10 monkey humpers between each exercise. Apparently 4 count monkey humpers was a bit zealous for some, but YHC went for it with gusto which resulted in a fair deal of mumble chatter.

Run to Sweetwater – Plank until 6

Lazy Doras
• 100 Merkins +  plank
• 200 LBCs + 6” leg hold
• 300 squats + Al Gore
Switch with partner every 25 reps

Run back to COT. Total we ran about 2.5 miles.

Thank you to all the PAX who have been a part of my first year at F3. Whether we’ve sweated together, shared a beer together, prayed together, or done a CSAUP together I have been blessed to share a bit of the good life with you. This is definitely more than a workout.

Thank you Peg for the opportunity to lead.

Stay Classy,
Homebrew

TClap |
5

Still in Abyssness

I seem to keep having my last Q in the Carolinas at least once a week now. Gonna need to stop calling it that until I got a final date for when I leave. Bones gave me the Q for abyss at sea legs, came up with something on the spot that went more or less like this today-

Mosey to basketball court, COP

Mosey to the back road. At top of back road, tried having us do rugby sprints, learned its kinda hard to do it coming downhill, didn’t realize the angle was as steep as it was when trying to stop suddenly for six inches. Did this all the back to basketball courts

WIth a partner, each man does 30 pullups  altogether, switching off to run to give breaks between sets. I love my pullups, and 30 is ambitious I think for most people.

After this went on to main event. Tried explaining the whole routine before starting, but learned it was alot easier to just go round by round and have the PAX follow along till the habit picked up.

ISLAND HOPPING

4 islands nearest us in parking lot, do a set of an exercise and run to next. then,Far away islands, run to each and do 15 LBCs.  last island near middle by COT, 10 burpees before moving on to next round. rounds were as follows:

1.10 merkins

2.20 squats

3.20 monkey humpers

after going through one cycle of this, PAX had it down pat. 10 minutes, left, started over with intention that everyone do as much as they could before time. Pax in lead got to monkey humpers again before COT called.  As usual, Jedi was beast mode and in the lead and never looks like he’s dying haha.

Had lunch with Qbert today who was present, I asked him what the general impression was of ” a whopper Q”, if it had any general characteristics . He answered that it was that nobody ever knew what it was going to be or what to expect. Really, Really glad to hear that because honestly, my biggest thing that I want to avoid at all costs, is to be too predictable or cliche when I lead the beatdown. So its good to know.

TClap |
2

Murph Jr and Balls to Wall-Whoppers last Q at crows nest

By a mixture of being out of town over the weekends and just staying up too late/laziness, I’d managed to avoid posting at crows nest despite it being literally the closest AO from my home.  What with me moving sometime between the 17-23rd, I was glad to get put on the Q schedule in advance so that I could have one last whirl for the time being. I wanted to do something unique and fairly painful for the pax.

Short mosey to closest parking lot, COP-

SSH
Sungods, forward and reverse, windmills, imperial walkers,

Musical Primer- At some Q’s they have brought speakers but NOT been playing 80’s headbangers, much less the one most appropriate to a classic exercise, Balls to the Wall!

Had the PAX get into peoples chair, one at a time run to walkway and perform burpee+shoulder tap, as the song played on shakespeares speaker via my phone bluetooth. At part right before chorus, We would go balls to wall. Fun little warmup.

Main Event- Murph JR

Mile run, 1 minute pushups, squats, pullups, with note taken to what max reps done by any of the PAX was.

Another mile run, and started running out of time so we didn’t go back to the pull ups. all together, did 66 merkins with a ten count break, and 60 squats, which was records from the 1 minute timed.

with two minutes left, mosey back to COT and did some ab lab, 10 bigboy situps, 20 4 count flutters and then time up.

Prayers for safe travels and england Godspeed in the world cup. humbled by the PAX and the support they have given me for over a year. At the end of this week I will know if my future is leading me to Greensboro, Washington state, or ft worth texas. Wherever I go, I know I will want to join or create fellowship like that I’ve had in F3. Thanks to everyone who has sweated with me and helped me grow as a man.

TClap |
5

Uptown Funk You Up

It was one of those crazy humid Carolina mornings where YHC actually had to turn on the AC on the way to the workout. You know it’s muggy when you’re already sweating with no sun, and no exercise. Bring 15 dudes into the mix and it got real sweaty real fast.

Disclaimer made, then circuitous mosey around the parking lot.
Circled up for: SSH, weed pickers, merkins, superman, low slow squats

The THANG
Uptown 50
I got this one straight out of the exicon. I read about it probably two months ago and had been looking forward to trying it since then. Two markers were set up (about) 50 yards apart on the basketball courts. PAX partnered up. The idea is to do 10 burpees then travel 50 yards via the prescribed means to the other marker, where you then do 10 more burpees and travel back to the start by the next mode of transport. There were 10 total lengths of 50 yards so 10 x 10 =100 burpees… plus whatever it took PAX to do 50 yards of burpee broad jumps. Lots of burpees.

Here were the modes of transport in order: Burpee Broad Jump, Crab Walk, Partner Carry (P1), Partner Carry (P2), Alligator Crawl, Wheelbarrow (P1), Wheelbarrow (P2), Nur, AYG (Sprint!), and Bear Crawl

Due to mumblechatter from PAX not wanting to scuff their fancy pants new running shoes up, Omaha was called on the Alligator Crawl, which was substituted for bear crawls. Great effort by everyone on pushing through this till the end.

Ab Doras

100 Boxcutters, 200 Big Boy Situps, 300 Freddies (double count)

P1 ran down and up the hill, while P2 did boxcutters. Flapjack and keep adding till you get to your number as a team. After boxcutters, runners went to end of the school and back for the big boy and Freddy rounds. Each pair made it pretty far into the 200 Big Boy Situps by the time 6:00 rolled around, and a couple of teams managed to break into the Freddies. Mosey back to COT.

COT
Announcements are all in the newsletter. Read it.
Prayers for Whopper’s job situation, Cha Ching with son #3 due to arrive any day, and safe travels for Tinsel’s sister who is flying to Ecuador. Very sweaty BOM.

Big thanks to Bones for the opportunity to lead.

Stay Classy,
Homebrew

TClap |
5

Of Relays and Dance Parties

Truth be told, YHC is losing his mind.

When I was asked to Q at the Deep for the return of the 0630 launch, my first thought was, “Hey! That AO is at a school. I don’t normally post at schools. I should do something to commemorate that.” Forget the fact that the majority of our AOs are at schools. That’s irrelevant. But, it does set us up for the dumb ideas that followed…

My memories of middle school in May involve basically two things: Field Day and the end-of-the-year dance. So, to harken back to the days of old, that became our theme for today. Twelve PAX (including one FNG) joined YHC for a baker’s dozen at Oakridge Middle. Here’s what we did (kinda):

Warm-up

Mosey around to the back of the school for our “field day” warm-up. Split into two teams for four relays:

  • Sprint (i.e., the basic relay)
  • Bear crawl
  • Broad jumps
  • Crab walks

That got our heart rates up and ready for the dance party. We moseyed back around to the front of the school for the fun to really begin.

The Thang

When I think of middle school dances, I think of songs you can’t really dance to, weird mixes, and lots of wallflower moments. So, we relived my childhood. Six songs. Wallflower between (people’s chair or balls to the wall each time). Today’s playlist:

  • Jukebox Hero – SSHs (slow and fast to match the music) during the verses, Rock Star jumps during the chorus/refrain/hook
  • I’m Gonna Be (500 Miles) – Imperial Squat Walkers during the verses, bear crawl and crawl bear during the “well I would walk” segments, and donkey kicks during the “da da da da” parts. You know what I’m talking about, because you’re singing it in your head.
  • The Middle – LBCs during the verses, flutters during the refrain, and some Freddie Mercuries during the bridge/interlude/guitar solo
  • Smooth Criminal – Plank jacks during the verses and a merkin for every “okay” (“Annie just freaking answer him already!”)
  • Sorry – Hold boat throughout, dropping down and completing one V-up for every “sorry”
  • The Devil Went Down to Georgia – curb dips during the “singing,” crab cakes during the musical interludes/fiddle or guitar solos
  • I Will Survive – lateral plank walks with merkins during the refrain (longest version of this song ever, but the brief rain made it a little more manageable)

We actually left out the song with the burpees. That’ll be reserved for the next dance party.

Quick mosey back to COT.

No earth-shattering announcements that can’t be found in the newsletter, so read your newsletter. Prayers for teachers (and students and parents) as school wraps up, and for Whopper in his job search/potential promotion. Late request added for the shooting that happened down in Texas.

Cofeeteria at Dunkin because it’s cheaper (in many aspects of the word).

As for the (somehow now infamous) FNG naming, well, that story can be saved for a verbal diarrhea run with Q*bert. You’ll also want to ask Cha Ching about his comment regarding the arrival of “Mr. Wood.” Um…………

I appreciate everybody participating in the stupidness of this morning. I wanted it to be fun and different. I think that happened. Thanks to Shakespeare for the opportunity to lead, for changing the launch time to 0630, and for the speaker to blast the music.

-Jedi

TClap |
2

Lots of wallsitting at the Deep

I fluctuate between wanting to do something super original and brutal and just going with repetition. Saturday I did both. I had COP fairly close to COT, saving the moseys for later. I had us go to the hill but instead of elevens, I entertained the idea of low crawling up the hill. We did it twice, running back down both times. Has potential but lots of anthills. Decided to mosey us to the nearest corner of the school to do indian wall sit. All of us lined up on the wall and sat it, with caboose bearcrawling to the front. we did this till the end of the western wall of the school.

I underestimated the length of the far end of that middle school.

took about 30 minutes to make it to the end. Moseyed to the football field for the main event.

BLIMPS x2, the second set of blimps in reverse order of reps, to get the burpees in hardcore. 120 yards each way, 1440 yards total. Took long enough leave us with time for  5 minutes of ab lab, started with my favorite, Freddy had a fat girlfriend.

Felt really sore sunday in my shoulders, given that we didn’t go super hard on shoulder stuff, not sure why haha.

TClap |
1

Gambling in the Abyss

What happens when you’re granted the honor of Qing at an AO you’ve not been to much and therefore, not to familiar with? Why, you scout it on Sunday with your kids after Church of course. Completely normal, right? For this group, you’re expected to “bring it” so you’d better know the turf. For those Ft. Mill’ers who’ve not frequented The Abyss, put it on your short-term bucket list. I didn’t explore much of it due to our card playing but this place is a gem.

Once the 16 of us rolled in on this beautiful Wednesday morning, I quickly noticed the footwear NASA was sporting and got a little concerned…for him. He let me know that he and a few other PAX would be breaking off to do a busted-foot-friendly-workout so I felt a little better about what we were getting into. The people-pleasing side of me wanted to make sure I had a little something for everyone so after typical butchered disclaimer, we took off for the basketball courts for our warm up:

Windmills

Side Straddle Hops of course

Super mans

Hand-Release Merkins

Jump Squats

Mosey back to the main lot and I had to grab the deck of cards I slipped under the cone. As many but not all were familiar with, each suit is a different exercise and the number on the card represents how many reps. Jack = 11, Queen = 12, King = 13 and the Ace = 14 (not 1).

Hearts = Wide Arm Merkins

Clubs = Carolina Dry Docks

Diamonds = Jumping Lunges

Spades = BURPEES (Yup, we did that)

After we recognized the deck must have been front-loaded with Wide-Arm Merkins and Jumping Lunges, it wasn’t long until we started getting smoked and a few 10-counts were necessary. In the end, we completed it all which totaled 104 of each, that’s right, 104 Burpees.

There was still a little left in the tank and on the clock so we had to round it out with Dying Cockroaches, descending 10ct leg lifts and the finisher…Lt. Dan’s. The latter was a lesson I would remember the rest of the week.

Bones, I appreciate the opportunity and I look forward to the next time.

Leave no man behind but leave no man where you found him.

Maximus

TClap |
5