Category: The Ranch

Monkey Humper Missionary Burpee Beatdown

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Raining on and off through the night and into the morning left us with a saturated soccer field as I pulled up to scope out the conditions.  Time to pivot from original plan and keep us out of the muck.

4 PAX at 0515

Disclaimer and we began to mosey toward Middle School when Mainframe pulled in.  Decided to be kind and not make him chase us so headed back towards the parking lot to meet him and do some warmups on pavement next to soccer fields.

Can’t remember warmup exercises since I am writing this two weeks late (lesson learned)

 

The Main Thang –

11s on pavement next to soccer field – about 100 yards between 2 stations with cone at the 50 yard mark

Station 1:  SSH (IC)

Station 2: Monkey Humpers (IC)

every time you pass the cone in the middle – 5 good ol’ normal missionary style burpees

 

We went on a short mosey after finishing 11s to recover and found our way back to the elementary building.

 

The Extra Thangs –

Performed a variety of exercises  (IC) while in a wall sit:

MNC, Overhead Claps, Toe Risers

Legs were starting to feel it but these 5 PAX came for pain so we performed a couple rounds of the following:

sumo squat shuffle the length of the sidewalk from the flagpole to the soccer field (Some thought it was not fair that Mainframe and I only had to do half the reps since our legs are so long…)

Move to curb – 1 Merkin with hands on curb then roll over and 3 dips then roll over and repeat until you make it back down to the flag pole

 

We then moseyed back to CoT and got in a few minutes of Mary

 

Thanks for the invite Poppins!

 

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Richard John Webb, Esq.

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5 PAX

Disclaimer
YHC added, I’m not taking responsibility for you following my suggestions until 0600.

1 mile buy in. Spiderman pushed the pace to 7:30/mi

Bobber joined us. 6 PAX

Warm-up
Wall sit for 6
Tibialis Raise
SSH x40
IW x40
HW x40
Yoga
Monkey Humpers x10

Mosey
Leg Sequence
1 burpee
2 bomb jacks
3 jump squats
4 jumping lunges (2 each leg)
5 Bobby Hurley’s (also renamed to every Duke basketball player I could think of on the fly for Mainframe’s “benefit”)
6 split squats
7 Carolina Dry Docks (on of these things is not like the other ones)
8 lunges (4 each leg)
9 monkey humpers
10 squats

Mosey
Leg Sequence
Added Bulgarian Split Squats in cadence x11
Added 1 pistol squat

Mosey
Bear Crawl the car rider line at the elementary school
Leg Sequence

Mosey to playground
Dick Webbs (Richard John Webb, Esq.)
We made it to 7 rounds. That’s:
– 28 pull-ups
– 112 merkins
We did another leg sequence in there to mitigate the lactic acid in our arms
Getting to ten rounds of this (with legitimate form) seems difficult. Challenge Accepted

Mosey back towards COT
Stop for Bulgarian Split Squats on the way

Finished the 28 merkins at COT
Flutters in cadence
Pigeon Lunge to hit 0600

Great to be out at The Ranch. Solid mumble chatter and Tressel proved he can still respectfully hand us our rear ends. (I’m paraphrasing Mainframe’s spot on observation)

NMM:
Here’s an actual text thread of me texting stream of consciousness:

Poppins: So whatcha thinking for tomorrow? Wanna hype appropriately lol
Me: Angry college professor takes out aggression on non-syllabus reading students
Poppins: So same old?
Me: Pretty much

(Then I was struck by a little more and I’m getting the vision of an eventual video trailer promo here)

Man who loathes the phoniness of Disney World is forced to pre-book meals at places he cares very little about visiting much less eating. And his only solace is an ability to bear crawl and perform burpees in the school parking lot before the sun rises.

I’m thinking the trailer ends with a clip of the man saying,
If it were up to me, I’d drink a nice whiskey neat and stare into a fire. But it ain’t about me, so I’m trying to live third and watch my kids have a good time. What a great opportunity to work on not being a selfish a-hole

I think there’s something here…I’ll keep work shopping it a bit

Thanks Bobber for sharing the Gaffigan bit on Disney. It will seriously be a good opportunity for me to work on not being selfish. If I’m gonna spend the cash on Disney, I might as well not ruin it with my attitude, right? https://youtu.be/eYacdfsORec

Prayers for wisdom when dealing with teenagers
Praise for my M being named Teacher of the Year at GHMS

Thanks Poppins for the opportunity to lead:

—
Band Camp dismissed

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Power of Ranch

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Another split Q for two IR guys: Ruby Slippers (restricted arm movement) and Harry Carry (restricted jumping-related exercises).  Total of eight pax in attendance.

Ruby started and did:
Took the PAX to the front of the school for some leg work. Planned 4 laps around the car rider loop with an exercise to be completed in each turn of the loop. At the completion of a lap the PAX were instructed to head to the benches from some Bulgarian Split Squats and Step Ups.  Here was the flow:  Lap 1 – 10 Jump Squats in every turn and then complete 15 BSSs per leg and 15 Step Ups per leg,  Lap 2 – 10 Jumping Lunges in every turn and the complete 15 BSSs per leg and 15 Step Ups per leg,  Lap 3 – 10 Squats in every turn and then complete 15 BSSs per leg and 15 Step Ups per leg,  Lap 4 –  10 Alt. Lunges in every turn and then complete 15 BSSs per leg and 15 Step Ups per leg.  Legs were definitely pumped after those 4 laps.  The PAX were passed on to HarryCarry for more torture.

Harry Carry (focus on arms) :
Thang 2.1: grab a bench and derkins (20X IC)

Thang 2.2: Suffer in place:
Pax split into two groups (P1 & P2): half ‘suffer in place’ while the other half do the exercise noted for 1 minute straight.
Suffragettes do Low plank, Exercisers do Merkins
Suffragettes do wall sit, Exercisers do bobby hurleys
Suffragettes do Balls to the wall, Exercisers do leg lifts
pax swap places and we go through the above again.

Thang 2.3: Fish tracks
move forward per the below, then stop and do exercise noted
bear crawl – merkins
crab walk – LBCs

Run to COT and do Big Boy Sit ups and mak tar jais. Fini.
Prayers for Senator who has since contracted COVID.

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F3 The Fort – Adopt a Highway (#2)

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****March 5th 2022- 7:45am – 8:00am****

Men,

We have officially signed up for the Adopt-A-Highway Litter pick-up program.  Our adopted Highway is US21 from Peachstand south to Sutton Rd. (2 miles). We will have a sign installed to promote this section of the highway.  We are encouraged to complete 4 pick-ups a year (once a quarter).  All supplies will be provided.  All we need to do is show up.  The SC DOT will come out and pick up our bags along the route after completion.

**Our NEXT Clean-up date is tentatively scheduled for March 5th. (start time )  7:45 am – 8:00am**. There is no time expectation for participation.  Stay as long as needed or head out early.  Modify as needed. Plan for 2 hours if you complete the 1-mile loop.  We split up into two groups last time and met at the halfway point.

We will begin at the Peachstand (rear of the building) and coordinate.  I have 30 vests and all supplies.

Fogerty will be the main contact for this event over the next two years.

Here are some of the logistics:

• Make sure your group knows that in case of bad weather the cleanup will be postponed. Litter collection should never be done in the dark or in bad weather.
• Notify local news media who may have an interest in publicizing your group’s activities. • Remind your group of the appropriate clothing. Long pants and long-sleeved shirts and sturdy shoes help avoid scratches and irritation from poisonous plants. Light or brightly colored clothing will make them easily visible to passing traffic.
• Be sure you have all the materials and supplies you’ll need beforehand, including first aid kits.
• Check with members of your group to be aware of any allergies that might be important (such as bee-stings, etc).
• Work out a plan for what you will do in the event of an emergency. Find out what the quickest route to the hospital is.
• Park vehicles at both ends of the adopted section.

• Volunteers must be at least 13 years old to participate in Adopt-A-Highway cleanups. Children under the age of 18 must be accompanied by an adult on all Adopt-A-Highway cleanups.

The state does provide adopt-a-highway orange and blue bags.  Orange bags are for trash and blue bags are for recyclables if you want to recycle.  Your group is also provided with orange safety vests.   We do require four pickups every year, usually once every quarter.  All that is needed to be done after trash is picked up is to call or email me and I will send one of our crews to pick up the bags.

It is volunteers like you who are going to make a difference by speaking up and doing what they can to help their community.  Please let me know If you have any questions, I will be glad to assist you.

Thank you,

Sherry J. Johnson
Administrative Specialist/
Adopt-A-Highway Coordinator
SC Department of Transportation
803-327-6186 O I 803-327-6184 F
JohnsonSJ@scdot.org

District Four Maintenance
338 Robertson Road West
Rock Hill, SC 29730

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1st Annual The Fort Weight Loss Challenge

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The weight-loss challenge for 2022 has been established to create some focus on the Queen.  The goal is fellowship, accountability, support, discipline, and a little motivation.  Pax will depart on a 90-day journey beginning January 3rd, 2022, and ending on approximately April 2nd or 3rd.

There will be a buy-in and payouts to the top 3 places – determined by “percentage of weight loss”.   Uhaul has agreed to be the holder of the buy-in with a tracking spreadsheet created for each pax to help monitor their progress.  Good Luck Pax!

T-Claps to Uhaul for assisting with this endeavor!

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Thanksgiving Convergence 2021

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68 PAX in attendance for a pre-thanksgiving beatdown and some fellowship on a brisk morning Thursday 11/25/2021.

 

With the anticipation of fried turkey, oreos and coffee brought by @Change Order, @Smuggler and @RubySlippers, mumble-chatter abounded,  until @Hardwood took the center and called attention at 0600 hours. Disclaimer was disclaimed and the call for new FNG’s was made, no new FNG’s was the lone blemish on the otherwise fantastic morning in my humble opinion.

Run options led by @Gekko and a Moderate group led by @TripleLindy set off as the rest of the PAX moseyed towards back of Springfield Elementary. First Destination was in parking lot way back by the Middle School.

Circled up and @Hardwood called out the following exercises:

SSH- 40

Windmills

Downward Dogs and Honeymooners

Low & Slow Squats

Cyclops: Stay in Squat Position and complete Moroccan Nightclubs

 

The Thing

Series of Webs

Starting with Merkins and Overhead Claps

1×4 for 10 rounds of excruciating shoulder pain, mumble-chatter becoming more focused on the task at hand

more SSH 🤮

Next we completed ANOTHER WEB, worse than the last,

Shoulder Taps and Moroccan Nightclubs

1×4 for 10 more rounds that was never ever going to end

Lots of requests for Burpees strangely or anything other then arm workouts!

 

YHC began the 2nd half of the workout with more SSH

Mosey around to front of Middle School with 3 stops for 5 Burpees OYO, at the request of the PAX

Line up at bottom of small hill in front of school and explain the workout, AMRAP LEG CIRCUIT

Teams of 4 ish men cycle through three exercises at bottom of hill individually:

2 Squats

2 Split Lunges

2 Bomb Jacks

Next Broad Jump up Hill to top and complete the following:

2 V-ups

Bear Crawl to bench

2 Step Ups

Run around and down to bottom of hill stopping at cones for 2 burpees (two stops per lap)

Meet back at bottom of hill and repeat, only this time DOUBLE ALL REPS TO 4X

Goal is to complete 5 rounds or AMRAP, almost completed but just short of time before we had to get back to COT

YHC shared a article on Gratitude, and then @Shady shared the heart of the Fort, the success of @Seamstress initiative with the help of the PAX, @Seamstress shared his excitement and appreciation for the success of the event! Great job by all T-claps!

Finally we had a shovel hand-off YHC taking the Ranch from a long line of great site Q’s which I hope to make proud.

Then we were finally able to enjoy the fried delicacies and coffee! Cheers!

 

 

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21-Gun Salute for The Veterans

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Great morning!! A little chill and NO rain!!
No FNGs. A solid group of 5 Caballeros!! Disclaimer was disclaimed.  Off we went.

Rain around the parking lot for warmup. Approx 500m. Circled up for warmups. 15-25 each of the following:
* SSH
* Windmill
* MNCs
* Produce/cherry/weed/strawberry pickers
* IWs

Then started the main event. A 21-gun salute:
* Run a loop (approx 500m) – the dang track out back was locked so we improvised, then when back at the start do….
* 21 Merkins
* 21 Hillbilly Squats – go down to a LSS, then on the way up transition to a hillybilly walker.
* 21 LBCs
* 21 MCs (2 ct)
* 21 American hammers (2 ct)
* Rinse and repeat

There were a few injured PAX present so most walked the lap, myself and Kielbasa ran it all and got in at least 5 rounds. The others got in 3 rounds plus extra exercises. Wonderful mumblechatter with this group! It’s been a while since I’ve seen my homie Kielbasa so it was great catching up and hearing about how his life has been.

Back to the COT.

Announcements: A LOT of opportunities to get involved. Read the newsletter and be intentional!

Prayers for health and healing for many; for Drop’s friend Kevin who is a veteran dealing with demons and struggles; for Keilbasa’s wife (praise) for all her work and help while they move into the next chapter of his business life; for all our veterans; for JD’s 2.0’s dealing with teen angst; for NASA’s wife and her health.

Special thanks to our veterans for everything. It takes a special person to sign on the dotted line and commit to the military life, not knowing what you are going to get, where you are going to go, what are you going to do, and whether or not you are going to come out of it alive – all to help liberate the oppressed, provide for those who cannot provide for themselves, defeat evil and tyranny, and help foster freedom in its many forms. They are doing these things all while not really knowing who they are doing it for, other than it is someone in need. It is the ultimate action or display of putting others ahead of yourself, living 3rd, and not expecting anything in return. Many cannot do this to the magnitude done by military members, as well as first responders. I have a 13 year old son who, if he has his way, will become a USMC soldier one day (it’s about 5-9 years away, pending if he goes to college). As a father this makes me as scared as it makes me proud, but when someone is so strongly driven by those deep beliefs, you are doing the world a disfavor by being selfish and trying to hold them back. When you see that in people, it is God in them shining through. God bless them all.

Thanks for the opportunity to lead. God bless.
– NASA

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Operation Love

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Team here is all the information for the soon and coming Operational Love event.

Attached you will find
1. The Turkey Sign Up sheet
2. The Facebook Post
3. The Volunteer sign up sheet
4. Vemo donation tag

Our goal is to deliver 40 senior families In the Paradise community a great Turkey with all the trimmings and 20 other families in need as well in our area.

If you can we ask for the Turkeys to be delivered on 22nd, but you can contact me if you need to make other arrangements. 262-676-9829

update I have got a place now that can hold 50 Turkeys.  So if you can buy sooner than later that would be awesome!

I can take them twice next week , Tuesday the 16th and Thursday the 18th after 5 pm.
We truly appreciate your support and if you have any questions please contact me .
Thank you for all your support!

Ron ( Seamstress)


https://m.signupgenius.com/#!/showSignUp/30e054aa8a723a3ff2-turkey

https://www.facebook.com/829918257211992/posts/1697778303759312/?d=n

https://m.signupgenius.com/#!/showSignUp/10C0F4BAFAE22A1F9CE9-operation

file:///var/mobile/Library/SMS/Attachments/33/03/BCC8342B-A53C-40BC-9408-7703907C7F4A/IMG_3500.PNG



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F3TheFort Holiday Drop-In

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The Forts annual holiday party will have a different feel this year.
With COVID still lingering we have decided to have a gathering but it will be a bit different.

We are encouraging The PAX to go to dinner with your M and either your Shieldlock, Whetstone, or small group of fellow PAX and their Ms. After dinner we will all gather for an hour or so of a social hour(s).
This will give our Ms the opportunity to meet the crazy fellas we spend the early mornings with but more importantly their M.

We are all fortunate to have this crazy group it is also just as important to try and let our Ms meet some other ladies in the community and possibly let them start great friendships as well.

Make it a day of F3. Start with the golf outing, go to dinner and then grab a couple beers, a bottle of J Lohr wine, a cocktail and let’s kick off the holiday season.

If COVID worries you or your M we will have an outdoor area to hang out at as well as indoor areas.

Where- Springfield Community Center- by the tennis courts/pool
420 Horton Grove, Fort Mill, SC 29715

Time- 7pm-9pmish

When- Dec 3rd, 2021

Contact- Backdraft with any concerns…

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Good Morning at the Ranch

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Five Fort Millians converged at Springfield Elementary for another day at the Ranch.  Here is what they did:

The Thang:

After introductions and a disclaimer, we recognized Sean Kelly (Shop Vac) with a moment of silence.  We then moseyed to the middle school and circled up at the pickup line in front of the new retaining wall.

COP, All in cadence:

SSH x 30, IW x 20, Merkin x 10, Windmill x 15, Squat x 20, LBC x 25, Jumping lunge x 20, Carolina Dry Dock x 20, Cherry Picker x 15, Mountain climber x 25

Form a line at the back of the road facing the new retaining wall and complete the following circuit five times:

10 merkins, run to the wall, climb over and run to the upper road, turn left and run back to the start.  Plank up when finished.

Mosey to the back of the elementary school and meet up on the cement basketball court. Split into two groups and complete the following:

Group 1 runs to the pullup bars and does 7 burpee pullups, while group 2 does squats (flapjack)

Repeat with group 2 doing Freddie Mercurury’s (flapjack)

Repeat with group 2 doing calf raises (flapjack)

Mosey back to our starting point at the elementary school for mini-ablab (all in cadence)

V-up x 10, Hello Dolly x 20, Superman hold x 30.  End with the Body Destroyer

COT

NMM

Thursdays have always been a running day for me with F3, but since I’ve scaled back the last couple of years, The Ranch has been my regular stop on Thursday mornings as of late.  I have not Q’d here in a long, long time and it was good to get back at it.  The group was pretty quiet at the start and I didn’t hear much of anything even during COP (I think Tesh was the only one counting with me).  Later on in the workout, he and Uhaul engaged in their usual chatter   (one of the topics today was Brittany Spears of all people -hahahaha).   It was a pleasure to lead the group today and I look forward to next Thursday.

Prayers/Praises:

Shop Vac’s family

ST’s friend Joe with cancer

Those recovering from Covid-19

 

 

 

 

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